21 Things I Don’t Like About Marketing

Here are 21 things I don’t like about modern marketing:  1—Telemarketing calls from a robot.  2—Telemarketing calls from a telemarketer.  3—A direct mailer that is a challenge just to open.  4—Freelance writers who call themselves “content strategists.”  5—Having to make a separate version of web sites and e-mails for smart phones.  6—Ads that allow you

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Horse Sense

This past weekend, my wife and eldest son and I went to a beautiful little stable in Pennsylvania so we could ride horses.  Well, they rode the horses. I declined.  The truth is I am not crazy about horses. They bite and kick and horse stables smell pretty bad.  Also, whenever I am on a

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Benny Goodman Rides Again

A  new commercial for HP printers has a background song with the lyric: “It ain’t what you do; it’s the way that you do it.” Gen X and Y probably think  HP was clever for writing the song. But us matures and boomers know that it was recorded decades ago by Benny Goodman, who played clarinet

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Mofo!

An article in the United States Postal Service (USPS) magazine Deliver (10/12, p. 13) shows a dimensional direct mail piece with the word “Mofo” imprinted on the outside. Are the USPS and the marketer who sent the mailer unaware that “Mofo” stands for “motherf–ker”?

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Newsweek is Dead

Another nail was hammered into the coffin of print this week. The event: Newsweek announced that after 80 years, it will end its print publication in 2013. Editor-in-Chief Tina Brown said: “We have reached a tipping point at which we can most efficiently and effectively reach our readers in all-digital format.” For me, this is another

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Trojan Needs Protection (from Bad Reviews)

DM News, a marketing trade publication, criticized Trojan this month for not integrating social media into one of its promotional campaigns. “The Trojan brand hasn’t tweeted in more than a year” said DM News, apparently in shock. Maybe Trojan hasn’t tweeted for a year because they have better things to do than social media —

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H.G. Wells on Copy Revisions

Why do your clients make so many revisions to the copy you wrote? “No passion in the world is equal to the passion to alter someone else’s draft.”  –H.G. Wells Why this is so I have no idea ….

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Slogans I Don’t Like

Slogans I don’t like: 1–Farmer’s insurance: “Bah-be-bum-bum-BUM-bum-bum.” Just stupid and not even catchy. 2–Dos Equis for its Most Interesting Man in the World campaign: “Stay thirsty, my friends.” Yes, I know they want us to stay thirsty for Dos Equis beer. But to literally stay thirsty, you would have to AVOID drinking their beer or

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