September 24th, 2008 by Bob Bly
A sin to be avoided in copy is using words that remind the prospect you are in actuality selling a product, not just educating or helping him out of the kindness of your heart.
One of the words on my forbidden list is “product.” Today I heard a radio spot for Joint Flex, an arthritis supplement, that repeats the word many times.
The announcer says: “Doctors love the product, patients love the product, you will love the product.”
Why call it “the product”? Why not be more specific and use the name?
My rewrite: “Doctors love Joint Flex, patients love Joint Flex, you will love Joint Flex.”
A yacht salesman refers to his top-of-the-line model as a “yacht” or “she.”
A car salesman refers to a sports car as a sports car, automobile, or “a beauty.”
You never hear a good salesperson say “our product” or “my product.”
Neither should a good copywriter.
“Product” instantly breaks the spell of enticing copy and says to the prospect, “Don’t forget, we want your money.”
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