Comments on: How Would You Rate This Headline? http://bly.com/blog/general/how-would-you-rate-this-headline/ bly.com direct marketing blog Thu, 08 Jan 2009 13:21:28 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.3.1 By: CharityPrater http://bly.com/blog/general/how-would-you-rate-this-headline/#comment-673965 CharityPrater Fri, 27 Jun 2008 19:49:23 +0000 http://bly.com/blog/general/how-would-you-rate-this-headline/#comment-673965 You don't need to be a carpenter to build a deck. You don't need to be a programmer to create a website. You don't need to be a mathematician to buy stocks. And you certainly don't have to be a writer to write direct mail. You don’t need to be a carpenter to build a deck. You don’t need to be a programmer to create a website. You don’t need to be a mathematician to buy stocks. And you certainly don’t have to be a writer to write direct mail.

]]> By: Bob Bly http://bly.com/blog/general/how-would-you-rate-this-headline/#comment-673881 Bob Bly Wed, 18 Jun 2008 11:52:19 +0000 http://bly.com/blog/general/how-would-you-rate-this-headline/#comment-673881 Dina: there is no ambiguity in "quadruple," which means a 300% gain. If you buy $10,000 worth of the stock, and it quadruples, it's now worth $40,000, giving you a $30,000 profit before commissions. Dina: there is no ambiguity in “quadruple,” which means a 300% gain. If you buy $10,000 worth of the stock, and it quadruples, it’s now worth $40,000, giving you a $30,000 profit before commissions.

]]> By: Dianna Huff http://bly.com/blog/general/how-would-you-rate-this-headline/#comment-673879 Dianna Huff Tue, 17 Jun 2008 21:47:34 +0000 http://bly.com/blog/general/how-would-you-rate-this-headline/#comment-673879 As a person who reads investment articles, I would by-pass this one. Too gimmicky. As a person who reads investment articles, I would by-pass this one. Too gimmicky.

]]> By: Dina http://bly.com/blog/general/how-would-you-rate-this-headline/#comment-673878 Dina Tue, 17 Jun 2008 21:16:25 +0000 http://bly.com/blog/general/how-would-you-rate-this-headline/#comment-673878 Although I am new to direct response copywriting, I am not new to marketing. I find this headline to be very bland... easily overlooked. In the words of Seth Godin, unremarkable. But as it has been pointed out already, I am NOT the customer...maybe :) I think the market/customer dictates what is an effective, converting headline. And, what works in one industry may not work in another. For an investor, there is no pull in this headline. It is general, and too broad. It requires the reader to do too much work... just how much is quadruple in this case? That's just my uneducated opinion, from the newbie on the block :) Dina Although I am new to direct response copywriting, I am not new to marketing.

I find this headline to be very bland… easily overlooked. In the words of Seth Godin, unremarkable. But as it has been pointed out already, I am NOT the customer…maybe :)

I think the market/customer dictates what is an effective, converting headline. And, what works in one industry may not work in another.

For an investor, there is no pull in this headline. It is general, and too broad. It requires the reader to do too much work… just how much is quadruple in this case?

That’s just my uneducated opinion, from the newbie on the block :)

Dina

]]> By: Jodi Kaplan http://bly.com/blog/general/how-would-you-rate-this-headline/#comment-673877 Jodi Kaplan Tue, 17 Jun 2008 21:02:44 +0000 http://bly.com/blog/general/how-would-you-rate-this-headline/#comment-673877 Is it clever and original? Not really. However, as with all direct marketing, the real question is, did it work? Is it clever and original? Not really. However, as with all direct marketing, the real question is, did it work?

]]> By: Dave Simon http://bly.com/blog/general/how-would-you-rate-this-headline/#comment-673876 Dave Simon Tue, 17 Jun 2008 20:54:34 +0000 http://bly.com/blog/general/how-would-you-rate-this-headline/#comment-673876 It is always fun to hear copywriters talk about what is a good headline or not. To me, the only opinion that counts is the people who are getting the piece of direct mail. If it sells, then it is a good headline. If it doesn't, it 'aint! A simple A/B split test will give you the results that you need to judge the effectiveness of any headline or envelope teaser copy. Remember: You are NOT your customer. Their's is the only opinion that counts. If you write to impress other copywriters with you cleverness you are doomed. It is always fun to hear copywriters talk about what is a good headline or not. To me, the only opinion that counts is the people who are getting the piece of direct mail. If it sells, then it is a good headline. If it doesn’t, it ‘aint!
A simple A/B split test will give you the results that you need to judge the effectiveness of any headline or envelope teaser copy. Remember: You are NOT your customer. Their’s is the only opinion that counts. If you write to impress other copywriters with you cleverness you are doomed.

]]> By: Igor Boyko http://bly.com/blog/general/how-would-you-rate-this-headline/#comment-673874 Igor Boyko Mon, 16 Jun 2008 07:25:05 +0000 http://bly.com/blog/general/how-would-you-rate-this-headline/#comment-673874 I suppose, it's a bad headline. Better "Three stocks set to quadruple in price in the next 3 months." I suppose, it’s a bad headline.
Better “Three stocks set to quadruple in price in the next 3 months.”

]]> By: Ken http://bly.com/blog/general/how-would-you-rate-this-headline/#comment-673867 Ken Sun, 15 Jun 2008 00:38:12 +0000 http://bly.com/blog/general/how-would-you-rate-this-headline/#comment-673867 Does old, tired and over-used always equal ineffective? And is it old, tired and over-used because we as copywriters have deemed it so, or because it doesn't work anymore? If it gets opened, it's great...if it doesn't, it stinks. Isn't it ultimately up to the newsletter subscribers to decide? Does old, tired and over-used always equal ineffective?
And is it old, tired and over-used because we as copywriters have deemed it so, or because it doesn’t work anymore?
If it gets opened, it’s great…if it doesn’t, it stinks. Isn’t it ultimately up to the newsletter subscribers to decide?

]]> By: Lou Wasser http://bly.com/blog/general/how-would-you-rate-this-headline/#comment-673862 Lou Wasser Fri, 13 Jun 2008 20:25:43 +0000 http://bly.com/blog/general/how-would-you-rate-this-headline/#comment-673862 Speaking as a copywriter and a former investments salesman, I can assure you the Devil is in the details. And this promo's paltry lack of details certainly goes a long way towards making it "lame." Stocks in what sector? Energy? Pharmaceuticals? Hi Tech? Particularly in this economy, to part with his dollar,an investor wants to know about a specific driving force or catalyst that's going to quadruple a stock. Are we talking about a new drug to inhibit the growth of malignant tumors? Are we talking about the discovery of new gold Deposits in Peru? Granted, this is a lot of information to ask of a mere headline. But at least give us some kind of specific hint or coming attraction. And why THREE stocks quadrupling? Is this some kind of magic dance? Do they move at once? Is there a shaman at work here? "I've Got A Bridge In Brooklyn I want to Sell You" has more possibilities than the promise on the envelope you received. Speaking as a copywriter and a former investments salesman, I can assure you the Devil is in the details. And this promo’s paltry lack of details certainly goes a long way towards making it “lame.”

Stocks in what sector? Energy? Pharmaceuticals?
Hi Tech? Particularly in this economy, to part with his dollar,an investor wants to know about a specific driving force or catalyst that’s going to quadruple a stock. Are we talking about a new drug to inhibit the growth of malignant tumors? Are we talking about the discovery of new gold Deposits in Peru?

Granted, this is a lot of information to ask of a mere headline. But at least give us some kind of specific hint or coming attraction.

And why THREE stocks quadrupling? Is this some kind of magic dance? Do they move at once? Is there a shaman at work here?

“I’ve Got A Bridge In Brooklyn I want to Sell You” has more possibilities than the promise on the envelope you received.

]]> By: Bob Bly http://bly.com/blog/general/how-would-you-rate-this-headline/#comment-673859 Bob Bly Fri, 13 Jun 2008 19:09:08 +0000 http://bly.com/blog/general/how-would-you-rate-this-headline/#comment-673859 Brian: you have to know your audience. In this case, the mailing is going to a list of people who subscribe to investment newsletters. As publisher Porter Stansberry has said, these people do not want to know how to invest. During the height of the dot.com era, I had great success with this headline: "The One Internet Stock You MUST Own Now! Hint: It's NOT the One You Think." They basically want to hear a story about a stock that could double in 12 months. So the IDEA of the promotion is right on the money. It's the execution that's faulty, because it's old, tired, and over-used. Brian: you have to know your audience. In this case, the mailing is going to a list of people who subscribe to investment newsletters. As publisher Porter Stansberry has said, these people do not want to know how to invest. During the height of the dot.com era, I had great success with this headline: “The One Internet Stock You MUST Own Now! Hint: It’s NOT the One You Think.”

They basically want to hear a story about a stock that could double in 12 months. So the IDEA of the promotion is right on the money. It’s the execution that’s faulty, because it’s old, tired, and over-used.

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