Bob Bly Direct Response Copywriter Official Banner

Should Advertising Claims be Bold or Modest?

April 23rd, 2007 by Bob Bly

The school of thought that says advertising claims should be bold agreed with Samuel Johnson, who said “Promise, big promise, is the soul of an advertisement.”

But there’s an opposing school of thought that believes advertising claims should be more modest, because then, they will be more credible.

For instance, I am writing a book to explain basic chemistry concepts to high school students and parents who want to be able to help them with their homework.

Possible titles include:

A. How to make sure your child passes chemistry.
B. Make sure you child doesn’t fail chemistry!
C. Help your child get an A in chemistry.

“C” is the biggest and most positive claim. So you think it’d be best.

But at least one teacher pointed out to me: “These kids aren’t looking for an A. They are close to failing now, and if they get a C or B they will be thrilled. ”

So which title is better — A, B, or C?

Or can you help me write an even better title?

And which school of copywriting do you belong to — big promise or small but more believable claims?

Share

This entry was posted on Monday, April 23rd, 2007 at 9:52 am and is filed under General. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

62 responses about “Should Advertising Claims be Bold or Modest?”

  1. Suzanne Ryan said:

    Bob–it sounds like part of the dilemma here is that you are marketing to two audiences: kids who are struggling to pass chemistry, and their parents.

    The teacher explained the kids’ viewpoint. But I would think choice C would appeal more to parents.

    Maybe you need a title and subtitle. A combo of B and C, perhaps: Make Sure Your Child Doesn’t Fail Chemistry
    (And Achieves the A They Never Thought They Could!)

  2. Suzanne Ryan said:

    As for my own preferences on writing big promises or modest ones, I like to get people worked up….so probably lean towards big. But I play it by ear.

  3. Chris Lake said:

    What about this:

    How to Develop Chemistry Confidence: A Guide for Students (and the Parents Who Help Them)

    Appeals to both audiences and implies the ability to earn the best grades possible without promising an A.

    I might say “Struggling Students” because it sounds better, but it might turn off those who consider themselves “too smart for that.”

    Big promises or modest? I am definitely for dialing things back toward reality, but I think I/we are more aware of the hype factor as marketing writers. As long as the audience for our ads goes for the Big Kahuna, well, I guess we will keep delivering it….

  4. Michael A. Stelzner said:

    Hey Bob;

    I thought you were done writing books.

    I saw your new book on the hot dog and now this.

    It seems you are coming out of retirement from writing book?

    Mike

  5. Jay Ehret said:

    Roy Williams, The Wizard of Ads, says that the world of preconception should match the customer experience. Make your advertising claims true. Do not promise what you cannot deliver.

  6. Mina Menon said:

    I don’t agree with terribly long titles or those that need subtitles. Anything that needs a subtitle is saying too much – that’s what the blurb is there for.

    You have a clear proposition and your titles are clearly talking to the parents. Starting from there:

    A & B are talking directly to an insight: if you’re the parent of a child struggling with chemistry, all you want is for him or her to pass. I think C demands too much ambition of such a parent and child, adding further stress to an already stressful situation.

    Another suggestion in the style of A & B:

    Chemistry: It’s Just Another Test

    Maybe you could turn it into a “help your children help themselves” series, and the franchise could be called “Banish the Monster”, with book one being:

    Banish the Monster: Chemistry

    I say believable claims over any other kind. Some big claims are also very real, just as some small ones are not credible.

  7. Bob Bly said:

    Mina: What about: “How to Pass a Chemistry Test”? Michael: The hot dog book was written long before my “retirement.” The chemistry book is an idea that just popped into my head and I am really in the stage of just toying with it. But yes, I will write a few more books before fully leaving the field to others….

  8. Kyle Whitford said:

    Bob- If the target audience is passive I would use a bold headline to ease them out of their trance. Help your student “Slam Dunk High School Chemistry.”

    If I have the attention of the target audience, a modest headline with a bold sub title:

    “How to Pass High School Chemistry”
    and cut study time in half, guaranteed!

    Kyle Whitford

  9. Dianna Huff said:

    Bob,

    Personally, I like Chris Lake’s title.

    Have you thought about why kids aren’t doing well in chemistry? Perhaps it is the way things are taught now in our ruled-by-the-standardized-tests schools? Have you talked to some of those tutoring services? I bet they could give you in the trenches insight.

    In my day, chemistry was FUN. I can still hear my chem teacher and his bromides: “Electrons are like chemistry students — they always seek the lowest energy levels, hahahahahaha.”

    That man could compute things faster on his slide rule than we could on our newly minted Texas Instrument calculators.

  10. Katie Cummings said:

    Great point! I think you should use something like this:

    Help Your Child Pass Chemistry and Maybe even get an A!

    Combine the two approaches and cover your bases. It’s the bold approach that gets the reader into the copy, but the modest approach that keeps them.

  11. Mina Menon said:

    Bob, the one with star quality is Kyle’s “Slam Dunk High School Chemistry”. You can practically see the cover!

    I’m not sure of the cover-all-bases school of thought. It’s too close to “unfocused” for comfort.

  12. Jodi Kaplan said:

    There were two things that got me through chemistry:

    1) old Star Trek episodes (no, really)

    2) a self-study guide that I bought before the Regents exam (state-wide annual tests in New York on various subjects) and used to teach myself enough chemistry to pass the test.

    My chemistry teacher was a very affable man, and, like Dianna’s, full of bromides, but he wasn’t a very good teacher!
    Personally, I would have liked a book called “Chemistry for English Majors.”

  13. Chris Gregory said:

    I think Katie’s closest to cracking the conundrum.

    It’s similar to those classic opportunity-style headlines: ‘How to make 25%, 78% — even 115% more income this year’.

    Make a believable promise… and open the ‘door of possibilities’ to an even more desirable outcome. Dare to dream.

  14. Emilio said:

    Why not “We all need a little chemistry”?

  15. Ron Mickelson said:

    “How To” sells. Look at how many books have sold with “How to” and variations of “How To”

    Who is your target market? Have you asked them what title would get their attention?

    Send a questionaire to chemistry students and ask them what they expect from your book. Those who respond with positive answers get a copy to critique.

    That should give you the clue what title to use.

  16. Frank Catalano said:

    I think Dianna is right on in her observation.

    Why? Because she’s focused on a pain point. Right now, it’s the fear parents have that their kids won’t pass the annual NCLB-mandated tests. (Getting an A is not as big of a deal as it used to be, because of grade inflation, and — in part — because no matter how well a student does on his or her report card, it’s how the child does on the state test that really counts in the current education environment.)

    What this indicates is that what worked in the past for a headline needs to be adjusted for current desires and fears.

    So I wouldn’t pick your A, B, or C. I might try a variation on C: “How to make sure your child aces the new chemistry tests.”

    Of course, this is just my own humble opinion.

  17. Mike Jezek said:

    I think the issue of whether advertising claims should be bold or modest depends upon your particular market. If you’re in a market where the target audience has sort of “seen it all” then you probably do NOT want to be to bold. A good example of that would probably be a portion of the baby boomer market that’s seen most of the ads for pain-relief products. Odds are these people have bought so many of these products and were disappointed, plus they’re getting differing opinions from their physicians. On the otherhand, if you’re in a consumer market that’s very dynamic such as business opportunities, you need to play up the sizzle if you want any action. So it depends on the particular market you’re writing to.

  18. Richard Armstrong said:

    The bigger the promise the better … but the bigger the promise, the more PROOF you need. So I’d like to get the fact that you’re a chemical engineer yourself in there somewhere, as in HIGH SCHOOL CHEMISTRY MADE SIMPLE (AND FUN!) BY A CHEMICAL ENGINEER. That’s not quite it, but you can see what I’m getting at. Big promise must be accompanied by unquestionable proof. Come to think of it, might make a nice series of books … tutoring in high-school math by a professional mathematician, tutoring in high-school physics by a physicist, etc.

  19. Richard Armstrong said:

    Or here’s a better one … “A CHEMICAL ENGINEER’S SIMPLE SECRETS FOR ACING HIGH SCHOOL CHEMISTRY” … or “A CHEMICAL ENGINEER’S ‘CRIB SHEET’ SECRETS FOR ACING HIGH SCHOOL CHEMISTRY.”

  20. Bob Bly said:

    Or: How to Get Straight A’s in High School Chemistry … by Someone Who Did.”

  21. Frank Catalano said:

    I have to disagree. The focus on grades is not what worries parents the most these days. It’s passing the state-required tests. A copywriter does the client a disservice by not being up on what really motivates the target audience. In this particular case, focusing on the letter grade (which the state-required tests don’t have) can hurt response rates.

    It’s important to have a subject-matter expert who’s current in an area in which copy is being written who is able to review headlines and copy to make sure they are speaking to the present, not the past.

  22. Bob Bly said:

    Frank: let’s agree to disagree. I have two sons, 17 and 14, and the focus is on the grades, which the students have much more control over. Colleges look at SATs, grades, and activities.

  23. Frank Catalano said:

    Bob: I’m happy to agree to disagree. Although this does raise another good (copy) point — that the approach needs to be based on the desired outcome. If it’s a parent, such as you, who wants a good transcript for college, then focusing on the letter grade is great. But if it’s a parent who is worried that a child may not be promoted to the next grade based on how the child does on the new proficiency tests, that may require a different approach. Depends on the target customer’s desired outcome.

  24. Pam Kock said:

    Maybe it’s because my kids are still too young to be sweating for quantified test results – I realize a lot rests upon those numbers – but my concerns would be different. More than grades, I’d want my kids to really absorb the material, develop a passion for the subject, and remember what they learned in years to come.

    But maybe that is not your focus. Is your focus truly on simply getting the grades or high NCLB test numbers? Are you teaching memory tricks or actual chemistry? Are you selling a shortcut to that A or tips to ignite the child’s interest in the subject?

    Unfortunately, the shortcut would probably sell much better.

  25. David Leland said:

    Boy, am I behind the curve here…it’s already May 10.

    The obvious answer is How to Help Your Child Pass Chemistry…

    That may mean something different to each parent and student. But the bottom line is that they will pass…

  26. how to make sex on the beach drink said:

    how to make sex on the beach drink

    how to make sex on the beach drink

  27. Sheri Cyprus said:

    I know I’m way behind on the date here, but I have to comment that David Leland’s direct headline is the best, in my humble opinion. 🙂 I’m a fairly new copywriter, but I’ve actually beaten the controls of a fairly famous copywriter with nearly 30 years experience (it’s not anyone here!!!!) by using direct, carefully worded headlines like David’s. “How to Help Your Child Pass Chemistry” has the ‘power words’ “how to”, “help” and “your” and it backs up the research (teacher’s comment) that the kids are looking to pass chemistry, not get A’s etc. Doesn’t this heaadline communicate the desired message in the best possible way to the target audience?

  28. big tit fucking movie said:

    big tit fucking movie

    big tit fucking movie

  29. Free people search said:

    Free people search

    Find peoples for free

  30. Oliver said:

    I think that if you use this site https://justdomyhomework.com/blog/how-to-cheat-on-homework you will never ever have any problems with your homework! CHeck it out as soon as possible

  31. walmart credit card login said:

    Walmart, the world’s largest company by revenue, mostly accepts Discover,Amex (American Express) or Visa cards. Walmart offers two credit card options to its consumers – a store-only card and a MasterCard.
    http://walmartcreditcard-login.org

  32. Speedypaper said:

    To write A-worthy essays, reports, term papers, and theses every time, you should emulate exemplary writings and use winning techniques: https://speedypaper.app/

  33. Chloe said:

    This https://papercoach.co/ is a students’ academic helper website, where you will find assistance with any issue related to the study.
    Check it out.

  34. luckyl said:

    Thank you amazing post. Meditrek Homework help – post Assignments, Research Papers and Homework Questions. Chat with experts online now!. Get meditrek help at Studyfull. Post your meditrek homework questions and papers and get answers/solution from professional experts. Thousands of online meditrek tutors/experts are ready to help you with your meditrek homework now!

  35. Sciatica treatment said:

    Impressive article with perfect color scheme you have, our blog is really a good platform to get informative posts. It is really a helpful platform

  36. shashi said:

    This website is from uk for homework assignment.

  37. test said:

    home assignment Homework Assignment

  38. moharris said:

    read celebrity wiki, facts, & Biography
    <a href="<a href="https://www.fairtilt.com/sevda-erginci/“>sevda erginci age

    <a href="<a href="https://www.fairtilt.com/sevda-erginci/“>sevda erginci height
    <a href="<a href="https://www.fairtilt.com/sevda-erginci/“>sevda erginci biography

  39. moharris said:

    Read Celebrity Biography
    sevda erginci age

    sevda erginci height

  40. Corwin said:

    puppies for sale,pug puppies for sale in oregon,pug puppies for sale in az,pug puppies for sale in va,pug puppies near mepugs for sale,pug puppies for sale,pugs for sale near me,cheap pugs for sale,pug puppies for sale near me teacup pug [ We breed with exception. We are engaged in the breeding of Pug puppy for sale, which is the most desired bulky puppy. During many years of work we could breed Pug puppies, with the most unique and exceptional colors you will dream of having. At the moment our cattery is one of the biggest in the USA who produced these valuable Pug puppies. All our Pug puppy for sale are transferred according to the law with documentation and all our Pug puppy and puppies are with registration AKC. As a family, we have loved, cared, breed, and lived with different kinds of puppies for over 10 years, pug puppies for sale,pug puppies for sale near me.
    https://pugslandbreeder.company.com

  41. robert said:

    https://savannahbengal.company.com/

  42. Borjan Shoes said:

    Borjan welcome their worth it customers to online chappal store to give them a high-quality product online as well. Check borjan for better shoes design.

  43. ShopECS said:

    Buy best and trendy ladies wallets from ECS online in Pakistan. ECS is providing best quality and design for women wallets.

  44. Rajesh Pahan said:

    Diwali ????? ?? ??????? ??? ?? ????? ??? ?? ???? ??? ???? ???? ???? ???? ???? ?? ???? ????????? ??? ?? ?? ??? ?????? ????, ??? ?? ?????? ?? ??????? ???? ?? ??? ????? ???? ???? ??????? ??? ?? ??? ….
    Essay on Diwali in Hindi

  45. Rajesh Pahan said:

    ????? ?? ??? ?? ???????? ??? ????? ???? ?? ??????? ?????? ??? ?? ??? ?? ???????? ?????????? ?? ????? ??? ?? ?? ?????? ????? ????????, ????????, ????????? ???????, ????? ????, ??????? ?? ???????? ?????????? ???? Karan Johar ?? ?…… Karan Johar Biography In Hindi

  46. Ndure Shoes said:

    Grab new pumpy shoes from Ndure today, mixing both style and comfort into a quality product.

  47. Indigo lakes said:

    Great info on this Blog. Check out this community, Indigo lakes or to search other homes in North Naples here Indigo Lakes Naples. Find out more contact Naples Top Realtor and Naples REMAX Agent Mike Shoaff 

  48. donkyhote said:

    “Thanks, great blog!” Car Games

  49. Deutech said:

    Shop the best hair growth spray for healthier hair. Deutech’s hair growth spray provides a targeted solution for individuals looking to improve their hair density and volume. Assume the trusted expertise and elevate your hair care routine with our unique hair growth spray.

  50. sexy slot said:

    Thanks for such a pleasant post.

  51. BabyBoxShop said:

    Girl gifts are designed to celebrate the charm and grace of little princesses. Discover a treasure trove of gifts that inspire creativity, imagination, and a sense of wonder for young girls.

  52. iHost VPS said:

    This term indicates an interest in Virtual Private Server hosting solutions located in Canada. Users looking for a
    Canada VPS server are likely seeking a hosting provider that offers virtual servers with resources and infrastructure based in Canada.

  53. iHost VPS said:

    A virtual private server Canada provides users with a dedicated portion of server resources, allowing them to have more control, privacy, and flexibility compared to shared hosting. It offers a reliable and secure hosting solution specifically tailored for customers targeting a Canadian audience or requiring a Canadian hosting location.

  54. james willim said:

    Are you trying to pass Salesforce exam Salesforce PDI dumps with your own hands? Then you’re in the right place. Here you’ll find all the necessary preparation materials for passing PDI on your first attempt. Whether you are just a student looking for some practice exams or an actual Platform Developer I (SP23) certification holder looking for some exam simulation questions, this PDI certification material will help you get all the confidence needed to succeed in exam.

  55. Jui Weasley said:

    Regardless of the approach, clarity and honesty are crucial. The promise in the title mapquest should align with the content of the book.

  56. Bon Jovi said:

    It’s positive and encouraging, wordle without setting unrealistically high expectations.

  57. Nancy Naples said:

    Great info on this Blog. Check out this community, Isles of Collier Preserve or to search other homes in Naples Florida. To find out more contact Naples Top Realtor and one of the top REMAX Agents in naples florida

  58. REMAX Agents in Naples Fl said:

    Your comprehensive guide on interviewing a real estate agent is incredibly insightful! The listed questions provide a strategic approach to assess their track record, marketing techniques, and expertise. Understanding their past performance, approach to staging, and marketing strategies is invaluable for a successful home sale. Thank you for sharing these vital considerations when selecting a real estate professional! Thanks MIKE S – REMAX HALLMARK Naples, Florida.

  59. Tiptop-einrichtung said:

    Friseur Rezeption is a hair salon reception desk. This is the area where clients are welcomed, appointments are managed, and salon services are scheduled. It’s an important part of any hair salon’s front office.

  60. We Buy Dead Stocks.. said:

    Metal scrap in UAE refers to the discarded or unwanted metallic materials that are collected and processed for recycling or reusing purposes within the United Arab Emirates. As a prosperous and industrialized nation, the UAE generates a significant amount of metal waste from various sources such as construction and de

  61. Ramadan Packages said:

    The cost of Ramadan packages is influenced by factors like the quality of items included, the reputation of the supplier, and any customization options available. Consumers should consider these factors to determine the best value for their budget.

  62. Sabina Holt said:

    Feel free about knowing something new on solar energy, solar power and, of course, solar panel

Leave a Reply