Comments on: Why I Never Give Unsolicited Advice

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Wed, 21 Dec 2011 16:05:28 +0000

By: 3 Ways to Make a Huge Career Jump | Young Entrepreneur Council (YEC)

3 Ways to Make a Huge Career Jump | Young Entrepreneur Council (YEC) — Fri, 16 Dec 2011 22:33:34 +0000

[...] The honey pot strategy I used to hear friends complain about money, and I would rush to tell them what to do. Even when I knew the objective “right” answer, they never, ever listened to me. Instead, their eyes glazed over and they ignored me. Eventually I started resenting them for not listening (which is a ridiculous reaction on my part). After one-and-a-half-years of this, I decided to implement what I called the Honey Pot Strategy, where I let the right people come to me, via this blog. It has been a miraculous change. People are smart: Only the right people come, and the wrong people realize this site isn’t for them, and leave (that’s why I don’t mind when people say they’re unsubscribing from this site). Read more: Bob Bly, the noted copywriter, writes about why he never gives unsolicited advice. [...]

By: kedar

kedar — Fri, 09 Dec 2011 05:07:23 +0000

100% experienced!!

By: TM

TM — Sun, 04 Dec 2011 11:54:39 +0000

@ John C: I think you’re missing the point. It’s one thing to inform a cancer patient friend that you’ve heard of an alternative treatment. It’s another thing altogether to lecture or instruct them that they SHOULD do this alternative treatment. it’s not the same thing.

in the first approach, you would tell your friend, “I read about this new treatment, called blah blah blah, are you interested to hear more?” and if they say “no thanks, I don’t believe in anything alternative” then you shut up.

In the unsolicited advice approach you would say “you really should try this new treatment called blah blah blah” and proceed to talk lat length about it despite them saying or indicating that they’re not interested.

By: John C

John C — Mon, 07 Mar 2011 23:12:40 +0000

“1 — If other people really wanted your advice, they would ask for it.”

Wow Mr. Bly, as a famous copywriter you should have known that in marketing nobody ever asked for some of the most famous of brands.

Nobody asked for alkaline batteries, so why is Duracell #1?

Nobody asked for oversized tennis rackets, so why did Prince rise to #1 in the market?

Nobody asked for a tennis shoe with a waffle bottom. Everyone was wearing old fashioned basketball shoes. So why did Nike become #1 if nobody asked for them?

PEOPLE CANNOT ASK FOR SOMETHING THAT’S GREAT THAT THEY DON’T KNOW ABOUT. You have to tell them first.

I’m surprised at you. If your friend was dying of cancer and you knew about a revolutionary treatment that worked, would you keep silent if
they said they were going to use chemotherepy?

People OFTEN don’t know they are doing things the hard way. That they are hurting themselves and they don’t know it. That there is a clearly BETTER way. It’s impossible for them to ask.

By: Sebi

Sebi — Wed, 02 Feb 2011 21:58:50 +0000

Thank you for this excellent article. My experiences confirm what you say. I did not often give unsolicited advice in recent years but everytime I did I regreted it.

By: George

George — Wed, 05 Jan 2011 15:08:43 +0000

If a relative comes to you asking for money, does that not entitle you to give advice to get them out of the situation that requires money?

>It seems to me that most unsolicited advice
>is very unhelpful because the person giving
>it really doesn’t understand your situation.

Bullpuckey. If my sister needs money to pay the rent while she’s a student, yet she’s living in an apartment that costs twice the minimum rent for the locale and she’s not seeking even part-time work, then you, I, and everyone else reading this post fully understands the situation.

By: mj

mj — Mon, 27 Dec 2010 06:21:37 +0000

I heard about a psychology study that found that when people give unsolicited advice, they feel very good, and when people receive unsolicited advice, they feel terrible.

It seems to me that most unsolicited advice is very unhelpful because the person giving it really doesn’t understand your situation. You can keep explaining it forever, but they think they have a simple solution that is going to fix all your problems. It’s actually kind of insulting.

By: Bonus Good Reads From Around The Web

Bonus Good Reads From Around The Web — Wed, 25 Aug 2010 23:43:17 +0000

[...] is an older article about not giving unsolicited advice. It makes a lot of sense since there isn’t much point in giving advice if it is not likely [...]

By: Why I Never Give Unsolicited Advice – bly.com blog – bly.com direct marketing blog « Kre8iv1 – say "Creative One"

Thu, 24 Jun 2010 18:26:23 +0000

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