Do You Obsess About Money?
April 20th, 2005 by Bob Bly
The song ?I Am? by Train has this line: ?I never had a day where money didn?t get in my way.?
Is money a problem for you?
Numerous surveys show that couples fight about money more than anything else, with the possible exceptions of division of household labor, parenting, and sex.
I am in the middle of the road as far as money is concerned: I like money and it is important to me, but I am not obsessed with it.
Here are 5 money tips that have worked for me; they may or may not work for you:
1. Do something in which you can make a higher than average income. A lot of white collar corporate guys my age (47) in my neighborhood (Bergen County, NJ) make around $100,000 a year. So I want to make at least double that. (I typically make at least 5 to 6 times that, but my goal is to double it.)
2. The best piece of financial advice for self-employed people I ever got was from Florida freelance writer David Kohn: ?Live below your means.? This was easy when I was single; having a wife who likes to spend money makes it more difficult.
3. Train yourself to enjoy feelings of affluence and wealth from having money rather than from having possessions. If you have to buy and own stuff to feel wealthy (the BMW), you will get caught in a vicious cycle of spending money as you make it ? and always needing more.
4. Have no consumer debt. I always pay cash for cars. I bought my first home with a mortgage because I had to. But the next house I bought for cash.
5. Avoid ?compare despair.? There will always be people richer and poorer than you. Unless you are Bill Gates, you will never be the richest kid on the block. So don?t get caught up in worrying about whether your neighbor has more than you.
This entry was posted on Wednesday, April 20th, 2005 at 7:11 am and is filed under General. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
April 20th, 2005 at 9:31 am
Why is it, Bob, that so many writers focus on low paying markets? I know lots of freelancers who complain bitterly about how little they earn, yet continue to toil away writing for magazines and newspapers that pay peanuts.
April 20th, 2005 at 11:07 am
Why is it important to do better than the people around you?
(I realise that benchmarking is often good and that this is really the aim of the capitalist society, but sometimes I wonder why more is better?)
Isn’t it better to say $200k is what I want, and I won’t compromise myself for the sake of an extra $20k?
April 20th, 2005 at 12:36 pm
Well, since I started up my tech writing business about three months ago, these days I worry about it a lot. What you say is good advice, though. My long term thought was that getting my own business running and gradually working towards better paying contracts would mean more financial independence. Check in next year, and I’ll let you know how it went. 🙂
April 21st, 2005 at 6:41 am
What you say makes a lot of sense for someone in your position. I lost my job 4 years ago, from a career that lasted 24 years and paid a bit over $100k/year, not including bonuses. The bottom dropped out of telecom and people stopped using sales engineers. I ended up taking jobs that paid 80% less than I was making in order to have benefits for my diabetes. Sure, I would love to be able to just double my income. And double it again and again. I’m a few months shy of age 50, my certifications are outdated and very expensive and time consuming to renew. Not to mention, younger people with more certs are being highered for half of what I made 4 years ago.
Bob, I respect you and your work. However, I do not agree with you. The light is much brighter at your end of the tunnel. From my vantage point it’s a pinhole.
G.
April 21st, 2005 at 11:27 am
I’ve always thought that having money for money’s sake is a miserly attitude. I would enjoy having money that I didn’t have to spend because of the security of never having to worry. But the idea that money shouldn’t be spent for enjoyment is rather repellent.If you can spend and honestly enjoy what you get, that seems to be a wiser choice than simply hoarding. For instance, if you have always wanted to go to Italy and now you can afford it, it would be crazy to say, “No, I like my money better in the bank.” Living below your means in order to have security and freedom to do things you really want later is one thing, but developing an attitude of having money put away just so money can be put away is another.
I do not advocate trying to outspend other people or buying stupid things that won’t add to quality of life, but I do think the position presented in the article is a little extreme. After all, money is only a tool used to get the things you really want.
April 21st, 2005 at 1:03 pm
Money is relative. Although I don’t have a BMW (or any other similar car), I do have a $8.00 pencil. I enjoy nice (expensive) writing implements.
Although I’m retired from my previous job, I am having some fun helping people improve themselves. I enjoy speaking in public whether or not I get paid for it. I enjoy workshops whether or not I get paid for it. If money comes out of it that would be great, if it doesn’t I can manage without it.
It’s important to have “enough” money. It’s nice to have “more” money than you need. What’s best is having enough and enjoying yourself.
Joel
April 23rd, 2005 at 8:02 am
“Train yourself to enjoy feelings of affluence and wealth from having money rather than from having possessions.”
This is so true … so right.
And it’s so sad that this GREAT FEELING gets so little mention today, mostly because people who are enjoying it are very unlikely to make a big deal of it (for all of the obvious reasons, including those so beautifully outlined in “The Millionaire Next Door) and because it’s a story the media just doesn’t see/care about.
The older I get – I’m 44 – and the more I realize how much stuff I already have, the less I want to buy more of it. I don’t want to store it or insure it or dust it. Until recently, I did spend lavishly on books, until I realized I have about a 3-year backlog waiting to be read right now. Enough is …. way more than enough!
Bob’s comment also reminds me of a hair stylist I used to go to. He always wished he had a million dollars ’cause he had about a million things in mind to spend the money on. Well, if you have a million dollars and spend it … you don’t have a million dollars any more. I never could get him to see that.Oh, well.
April 23rd, 2005 at 8:43 am
Then there’s the “risk vs. reward” equation to consider: The greater the risks you’re willing to embrace, the greater the reward for success.
Launching a solo writing career can be risky, but it has rewards commensurate with those risks. I’ve learned to be discrete about my income, however, so as not to stir resentment, i.e., “You make that kind of money just for writing?”
Funny, the resentment always comes from the same people who ridiculed my pursuit of degrees in art and creative writing: “How will you ever make a living?”
Sigh.
April 25th, 2005 at 11:47 am
Money is not everything, but it is important. It ranks up there with oxygen, water, etc. Everybody has basically the same ‘needs’ but completely different ‘wants’, therein lies the catch. So it is basically up to each one of us to determine what we ‘want’ and work towards that financially. As for me, I just want enough money so I don’t have to worry about money.
April 25th, 2005 at 5:54 pm
Over the past 20 years I’ve experienced fairly comfortable, broke, relieved to be merely comfortable, really broke, very comfortable, worried about going broke again, and currently reasonably comfortable.
One of the reasons I moved to Pittsburgh was because I could live the way I wanted to without being house-poor as I’d have been staying in New England. If you’re self-employed and mobile, why spend your earnings on shelter?
I drive a ’93 Saab (paid cash) and my wife a ’95 Volvo. We will do so until they just don’t go anymore. But we eat out often, go to the theatre, and travel a lot. So that’s where the money goes – on experiences, not things. I have no fond memories of any new car or stereo I’ve ever owned, but lots of memories of the three continents we’ve visited.
So I suppose the moral is to marry someone with the same values. We rarely argue about money. When it came time to buy a new Dacor cooktop that we “needed”, there was no issue about firing the landscaper. The neighbors might not like the weeds getting tall once in awhile. But they’ve never enjoyed a great dinner in Auckland, ate yogurt in Rila or took an unplanned taxi ride to the Panama Canal. So f_ck ’em.
April 25th, 2005 at 8:03 pm
Most folks are fond of misquoting the Bible by saying that “money is the root of all evil.” What it does say is that “the love of money is the root of all evil.” I’ve found that when you have enough money, you rarely think about it. When you don’t have enough, it’s ALL you can think about. When you reach the point where you realize you won’t die if you don’t get the latest “gotta-have”, you’ll find that you have enough money.
May 2nd, 2005 at 10:25 am
I really admire your work Bob, but I feel compelled to point out that in this post, you contradict yourself–you say that we should aim to earn a higher than average income, and that in your area, guys your age typically make $100,000 annually, so you want to make at least twice that much… but then later you exhort all of us to avoid “‘compare despair’… don’t get caught up worrying whether your neighbor has more than you.”
June 21st, 2005 at 5:56 pm
Bob,
I am trying very hard not to let a bunch of vitriol spill over onto this post. You see, I am so incredibly angry at myself these days, it inevitably boils over into some horrible harangue of an unsuspecting recipient. I’m angry at myself because I am just realizing, at age 36, that I have wasted the past 18 years of my life pursuing an education and career that is worthless. I wish I had read your list of financial advice 20 years ago.
But it’s not good to dwell on the past. I’m doing what I can right now to turn my financial situation around, but it is difficult when I’m supporting my family at the same time. Right now I have two jobs, plus two ebay businesses, and we barely make it to the end of the month without pulling out the credit card.
I must let you know, when you said you make $500, 000 per year most years, I almost choked. You say this with such breezy elegance.
That is 10 times what I make. Of course you don’t worry about money. You have it.
June 22nd, 2005 at 9:04 am
Put Jesus first above all things, and He will direct you in all things.
October 3rd, 2006 at 4:39 am
When do you think ringtones will be gone and phones will just be like mp3 players?
April 21st, 2007 at 11:31 pm
Lavoro eccellente! ..ringraziamenti per le informazioni..realmente lo apprezzo: D
April 25th, 2007 at 10:16 pm
round silver mirror
round silver mirror imjhpbdjno
April 26th, 2007 at 3:10 am
i still believe in love
i still believe in love jkgrjmcpai
May 18th, 2007 at 7:13 pm
Guter Aufstellungsort, ja!
May 19th, 2007 at 12:28 am
L’information interessante que vous avez! I’am allant revenir bientot.
May 19th, 2007 at 3:05 am
Grand emplacement! La conception est merveilleuse!
May 19th, 2007 at 10:49 am
Was kann ich sagen? Wirklich gute Arbeit erledigt mit dem Aufstellungsort?
May 19th, 2007 at 3:58 pm
Interessieren. SEHR interessant! 😉
May 19th, 2007 at 9:07 pm
pagine piuttosto informative, piacevoli =)
May 19th, 2007 at 11:44 pm
I’ll tell my colleagues about your page..!
May 20th, 2007 at 4:56 am
Nice site you have!
May 20th, 2007 at 12:38 pm
Lo trovo piuttosto impressionante. Lavoro grande fatto..)
May 20th, 2007 at 3:12 pm
work’s done the way it must be..! ^^
May 20th, 2007 at 8:19 pm
Lo trovo piuttosto impressionante. Lavoro grande fatto..)
May 20th, 2007 at 10:53 pm
Interessare, molto interessante. Come avete fatto questo?
May 21st, 2007 at 1:30 am
I’ll be BACK! 🙂 😉
May 21st, 2007 at 2:15 pm
Dein Aufstellungsort verdient nur gute Woerter. Danke.
May 21st, 2007 at 7:19 pm
Nice site you have!
May 21st, 2007 at 9:50 pm
Dein Aufstellungsort verdient nur gute Woerter. Danke.
May 22nd, 2007 at 3:03 am
I’ll tell my colleagues about your page..!
May 22nd, 2007 at 8:35 pm
Interessieren. SEHR interessant! 😉
May 22nd, 2007 at 11:06 pm
Very valuable information you have here. Thanks..
May 23rd, 2007 at 6:44 am
mmm.. nice design, I must say..
May 23rd, 2007 at 8:18 am
uk music real ringtones
uk music real ringtones asnjchgpgm
May 23rd, 2007 at 9:14 am
L’information interessante que vous avez! I’am allant revenir bientot.
May 23rd, 2007 at 9:23 am
v120 motorola ringtones
v120 motorola ringtones ydumyytdtv
May 23rd, 2007 at 11:43 am
The information I found here was rather helpful. Thank you for this.
May 23rd, 2007 at 1:37 pm
tamil 1100 ringtones
tamil 1100 ringtones asklerjbtr
May 23rd, 2007 at 2:11 pm
Was kann ich sagen? Wirklich gute Arbeit erledigt mit dem Aufstellungsort?
May 24th, 2007 at 1:18 am
digi ringtone caller
digi ringtone caller jwlmyurluj
May 24th, 2007 at 5:15 am
mmm.. nice design, I must say..
May 24th, 2007 at 7:43 am
Grand emplacement! La conception est merveilleuse!
May 24th, 2007 at 12:36 pm
I’ll be BACK! 🙂 😉
May 24th, 2007 at 5:26 pm
work’s done the way it must be..! ^^
May 24th, 2007 at 7:52 pm
Ich fand gute und wichtige Informationen – dir zu danken.
May 25th, 2007 at 12:51 am
Interessare, molto interessante. Come avete fatto questo?
May 25th, 2007 at 3:19 am
ooo! it’s one of the best sites ever! 🙂
May 25th, 2007 at 3:22 pm
The information I found here was rather helpful. Thank you for this.
May 26th, 2007 at 1:09 am
ooo! it’s one of the best sites ever! 🙂
May 27th, 2007 at 8:13 am
Interfaccia comoda, colori piacevoli, buoni!
May 27th, 2007 at 3:22 pm
La buona visione del senso!
May 27th, 2007 at 6:57 pm
mmm.. nice design, I must say..
May 28th, 2007 at 2:11 am
Great site! Good luck to it’s owner!
May 28th, 2007 at 5:49 am
9 su 10! Ottenerlo! Siete buoni!
May 28th, 2007 at 7:59 pm
Guter Aufstellungsort, ja!
May 28th, 2007 at 11:34 pm
Was kann ich sagen? Wirklich gute Arbeit erledigt mit dem Aufstellungsort?
May 29th, 2007 at 6:52 am
Du musst ein Fachmann sein – wirklich guter Aufstellungsort, den du hast!
June 2nd, 2007 at 6:24 am
work’s done the way it must be..! ^^
June 3rd, 2007 at 6:15 pm
Nice site you have!
June 3rd, 2007 at 9:49 pm
i’am really impressed!!
June 4th, 2007 at 5:04 am
Great site! Good luck to it’s owner!
June 25th, 2007 at 7:04 am
mature lesbian bbw
mature lesbian bbw
July 2nd, 2007 at 9:58 am
download free sex games
download free sex games
July 8th, 2007 at 6:40 pm
adult halloween cartoons
adult halloween cartoons
July 8th, 2007 at 11:32 pm
small hands big cocks
small hands big cocks
July 9th, 2007 at 4:05 am
sexy leg model amateur pantyhose high heel
sexy leg model amateur pantyhose high heel
July 9th, 2007 at 6:54 am
big boob and cock brazillian tranny site
big boob and cock brazillian tranny site
November 29th, 2020 at 3:39 am
Those shots paid immediate dividends in zapping an opponent who was making his first appearance in the United States and carried virtually name recognition on this side of the Canelo vs Smith Fight time pond. Canelo dropped him in the seventh round with an overhand right from off the ropes and followed up with body-shot knockdowns in the next two rounds to put an emphatic end to the night and secure his fourth world title.
January 5th, 2021 at 8:03 am
Happy to read this article. outstanding blog. please check our website for new article. Audit firms in dubai
Accounting firms in dubai
February 16th, 2021 at 12:46 am
Despite similar political opposition in 2014 when Belarus was the sole host of the IIHF World Championship, USA ice hockey Belarus was to be the host for the 2021 IIHF Championship. However, in the wake of the ongoing 2020–2021 Belarusian protests, several political groups, politicians and international entities.
March 15th, 2021 at 4:40 am
The North Queensland Cowboys are an Australian professional rugby league football club based in Townsville, Watch North Queensland Cowboys live rugby the largest city in North Queensland. They compete in Australia’s premier rugby league competition, the National Rugby League (NRL).
April 7th, 2021 at 12:52 am
Now, the New Zealander is fit again and has won his last Parker vs Chisora fight live on Roku four bouts. Chisora, meanwhile, lost to Oleksandr Usyk last October and will want to hit back.
April 27th, 2021 at 5:10 am
An entertainment expert who has successfully maneuvered through Kambosos vs Lopez fight time a range of projects in a variety of different fields, Snoop secured his spot as a fan favorite.
May 8th, 2021 at 1:08 am
Holyfield I am proud to be able to join Triller Fight Club as they McBride vs Holyfield live are exactly what our industry needed. They have reimagined the sport of boxing in a very exciting new way.
May 25th, 2021 at 3:21 am
Fiji also plays in the Pacific Tri-Nations, and has won the most Pacific Tri-Nations Championships of the three participating New Zealand Rugby teams. Fiji is one of the few countries where rugby union is the main sport.
May 25th, 2021 at 3:22 am
Euro 2020, is scheduled to be the 16th UEFA European Championship, UEFA Euro Live the quadrennial international men’s football championship of Europe organised by the Union of European.
June 6th, 2021 at 5:29 pm
I am really happy to say it’s an interesting article to read
June 12th, 2021 at 2:25 am
Pugs for sale,pugs for sale near me,cheap pugs for sale,pug puppies for sale,pug puppies for sale near me,teacup pug,pug for sale,teacup pugs for sale,teacup pugs,teacup pug puppies for sale, teacup pug for sale near me,pug for sale near me,pug puppies for sale under,teacup pugs,pug puppies near me,teacup pugs,teacup pug puppies for sale,pug puppy for sale,mini pug,baby pugs for sale,pug breeders near me,pugs for sale,baby pugs for sale,mini pug,teacup puppies for sale near me,pug puppy for sale utah,pug puppy for sale near me,pug puppy for sale cheap,pug puppy for sale ohio,pug puppy for sale in tennessee,pug puppy for sale massachusetts,pug puppy for sale illinois,pug puppy for sale in pa,pug puppy for sale texas,pug puppy for sale az,pug puppy for sale arkansas,pug puppy for sale atlanta,pug puppy for sale adelaide,pug puppy for sale australia,pug puppies for sale alberta,pug puppies for sale austin texas,
https://pugslandbreeder.company.com
June 29th, 2021 at 4:10 pm
https://savannahbengal.company.com/
August 29th, 2021 at 2:00 am
I agree with the poster above who pointed out that blogs, like other communications vehicles (like newspapers and direct mail) are just one of the many ways we reach out to our audiences to tell them about something — an idea, a product, a service, whatever. And in some fashion encourage/hope they’ll buy it. https://frenchiespugpuppy.com
pug puppy | pug puppy for sale | pugs for sale near me | pug puppies for sale under $500 near me | pug puppies for sale under $500 | pug puppies for sale | baby pug | pug
December 31st, 2021 at 1:43 am
Very valuable information you have here. Thank you for this.
April 25th, 2022 at 2:27 am
Here I am for the first time, and I found beneficial information. Very nice and well-explained article. Thanks for sharing!
copper silver ionization system supplier in uae/
and water Treatment company in Dubai UAE
June 2nd, 2022 at 2:52 pm
Our experienced team is considered one of the best in the real estate market. We assist you in selling your houses at the best rates. You can list your Houses for Sale in Long Island on our website. We offer rental services as well so you can rent your beautiful homes. Here are a few tips to help how one can sell their home.
June 6th, 2022 at 6:24 am
Striping is integral on roads and parking spaces. Line striping gives a clear sense of direction to the drivers in following the traffic rules on the roads and highways. In the parking areas, the thermoplastic striping Houston helps manage the space properly and directs the inflow and outflow of the traffic.
June 15th, 2022 at 6:41 am
The Career Coach take a unique and innovative approach to training and development, offering Individuals, Teams and Organisations bespoke Programmes, that are cost effective and guarantee a return on investment.
June 21st, 2022 at 4:22 pm
best logo design company professional designers value your business and money. We work dedicatedly to create your desired logo. Firstly, our team analyzes the nature of your business and your requirements.
June 21st, 2022 at 7:42 pm
photography pakistani wedding day will surely be one of the most memorable moments of your adult life. You can’t rely on your memories alone. On your wedding day, you’ll mostly have your eyes on your significant other, or see things from your seat.
July 3rd, 2022 at 4:11 am
Asus Kaha Ki Company Hai
July 5th, 2022 at 9:07 am
pakistani weddings photography are a wonderful team of wedding photography services innovative and creative professionals working together to create attractive photos.
July 5th, 2022 at 9:16 am
packaging design one of the beneficial branding services and profitable retail marketing methods that will benefit your company. Grow your brand with us, check out our affordable packages.
August 2nd, 2022 at 2:44 am
All Pakistani brands ready to wear are amazing but Jazmin offers their costumers the latest and trendy dresses for ladies at cost effective price.
September 7th, 2022 at 10:19 am
Our career coaches have decades of experience and have taken thousands of interviews across different industries – so you’ll be in AMAZINGGG hands for yourInterview Tips
September 27th, 2022 at 6:23 am
Affordable Custom Website Design Dublin that offers a complete digital solution in taking your business online. Our Award Winning Agency not only devises strategies for your brand, but we own it like our own. We are the best web design agency in Dublin & Web designers in Dublin Ireland.
October 17th, 2022 at 10:00 am
Stunning shimmer mist and diamond shimmer mists are offered by Rios, a great multi brand store. The shop brings amazing diamond shimmer mists. Their shimmer mist is perfect for your needs, fulfilling your demands. With their shimmer mists and related products, Rios is sure to meet all of your requirements.
October 24th, 2022 at 7:33 am
Marketing collateral design services were previously limited to brochures only but not anymore. As the marketing channels have increased so marketing collaterals have also taken a new form as blog posts, case studies, newsletters, email marketing, press releases, white paper, product guide or catalogs, etc.
October 28th, 2022 at 6:43 am
Grab amazing cosmetics and related products like face mask and charcoal masks, only from Rivaj So grab the high grade masking tape from Rivaj today and enjoy. Their sheet mask is truly unbeatable and offer a high degree of satisfaction. Rivaj offers face mask to their customers all the time.
November 4th, 2022 at 12:57 am
Are you in search of luxury pret wear dresses in Pakistan? Sifa offers an amazing collection of luxury pret dresses online. Grab your favorite luxury dress in all over Pakistan
November 10th, 2022 at 9:20 am
advance fitness by Bilal Brothers, established in 1979, is the leader in exercise, fitness, gymnasium and indoor sport equipment all over Pakistan. We work only with the world’s top brands and are proud to serve our customers with top-notch after sales service.
November 21st, 2022 at 8:21 am
Best Shisha in Ireland offers you a wide range of shisha with flavourful drinks to go with it. Bring in your friends and family and enjoy the secluded atmosphere we offer you. We are offering amazing deals on drinks and shisha combos throughout the week.
December 7th, 2022 at 7:44 am
Affordable Flights from FlightsnTravel provide the best flights to their costumer to travel around the globe with their love one, once in a Blue Moon.
September 27th, 2023 at 12:44 am
Celebrate the joyous occasion of a new baby with our collection of charming new baby gifts . Explore an array of delightful options that capture the essence of this special milestone. Whether you prefer personalised keepsakes, nursery decor, or soft blankets, our thoughtful gifts are designed to commemorate this precious moment in a meaningful way.
December 13th, 2023 at 4:27 am
BSNS Consulting offers comprehensive Digital Marketing Services in Pakistan, tailored to your business needs. From SEO and content marketing to social media management and paid advertising, our team crafts data-driven strategies to amplify your online presence. Experience measurable growth and a strong return on investment with our dynamic digital marketing solutions.
January 3rd, 2024 at 2:50 am
A Rückwärtswaschbecken is a backward or reclining hair wash basin used in hair salons. It allows clients to comfortably lean back while having their hair washed, providing a relaxing experience during salon visits.
January 25th, 2024 at 2:25 am
Exploring unique mixtures of Himalayan Pink Salt unveils an infinite array of taste possibilities. Pink salt blends are available in infused versions as well as blends with spices and herbs to suit every palate.
February 9th, 2024 at 2:25 am
Online grocery stores offer a myriad of advantages that have transformed the way we shop for our daily necessities. Imagine having your groceries delivered right to your doorstep. Online grocery stores provide the convenience of ordering from the comfort of your home, saving you time and effort.