DH, a B2B copywriter, shocked me by saying in a recent e-mail: “My clients aren’t looking for results — my clients are looking to make their jobs easier … I often write simply to take the stress load off my client.

“One client says to me all the time, ‘Thank you. You make me look good.’ That is my job, as I see it.”

I write a ton of B2B, and that’s not at all how I see my job.

My job is to write the strongest possible copy for the client’s product or service — copy that’s going to increase click through rates, conversions, leads, appointments, RFPs, and sales.

In other words, copy that makes the cash register ring!

So let me ask those of you who ARE B2B marketers — or who work for B2B clients:

What’s most important to you?

Writing safe, tame copy that is exactly what the client wants, and can be approved without hassle or rewrite?

Or writing the most powerful copy possible, to make money for the business?

RS, one of my e-newsletter subscribers, recently sent me a note that said: “You don?t give people a way to unsubscribe from just promos, so it’s either get everything or nothing. ”

RS would prefer that I give two options to my e-zine subscribers: (a) e-newsletter only or (b) e-newsletter plus promotional e-mails.

Should I offer this choice? Do YOU do it for your e-list?

If you answered “yes,” let me ask you: if someone wants my free e-newsletter but is not willing to receive my promotional e-mails, what is my incentive to give it to them?

“Nobody but a blockhead ever wrote except for money,” said Samuel Johnson.

I write for money — it’s how I support my family.

So if someone doesn’t think my free e-newsletter is worth what I ask in return for giving it away — which is her willingness to receive a few e-mails from me each month, mainly letting her know about my books, tapes, and other information products — why should I want her to continue to subscribe?

Or, as actors are fond of asking the director — “What’s my motivation?”

A colleague, MA, recently referred several potential clients to me.

When I thanked him, he said: “No need to thank me. When you do a good job for my clients, you make me look good — and that’s all the thanks I need!”

I give my clients referrals to other vendors I know and trust for the same reason MA does: to help my clients.

Tha’s why it shocks me when vendors approach me and say: “Send business to us and we’ll give you a referral fee.”

I always refuse such arrangements, for two reasons.

First, I consider it my duty to my clients to refer them to the best vendor for the job — not the one who pays me.

And second, clients come to me for objective, unbiased advice. If I am getting a kick-back from the vendor, how objective can my advice to use their services be?

So I never accept referral fees from vendors … nor do I pay fees to get referrals.

Do you agree with me that paying for referrals is wrong? Or am I missing the boat on this one?

Here’s another example of (to me) inappropriate rage caused by Internet marketing:

“I am ANGRY,” said LE in a voice mail he left me. “I ordered your World’s Best-Kept Copywriting Secrets, but instead of getting a BOOK, I get some computer file I have to download.

“I don’t want to read your book on the computer screen. I want a BOOK I can hold in my hands. Either send me the book or cancel my order.”

Well, here’s the copy from the landing page where LE ordered the book:

“The World?s Best-Kept Copywriting Secrets … is an e-book. There?s no printing or shipping cost. The e-book is delivered as a downloadable PDF file.”

What part of that do you think was unclear to LE? This wasn’t in fine print or a footnote, either. It was part of the sales letter.

Of course, I gave LE back his money.

The lesson for those of us selling information online?

Make the format VERY clear in your copy. Specify whether your information is an e-book, e-course, MP3, audio CD, DVD.

But LE, if you’re reading this — don’t you feel your “anger” was perhaps a tad inappropriate, given that I clearly told you it was an ebook you were ordering?

BTW, LE, you don’t have to read an e-book on the computer screen. You can hit the print button, print it on your laser printer, and read a hard copy. I do that with all the e-books I buy, punch three holes in the print out, and store it in a 3-ring binder.

AN, a Web designer, seems to think so.

The other day he sent me an e-mail saying he enjoys my books — but that my Web site, www.bly.com, is crappy and poorly designed.

He never bothers to ask first whether the Web site is working — or how much money it is making for me — issues that apparently don’t concern him nearly as much as the fact that I don’t use a CMS (content management system) or that my pages are in HTML, something he doesn’t like.

Of course, for a fee, Web designer AN can fix it for me — and make it much better. Or so he says.

Let me ask those of you, especially those of you who either (a) have Web sites or (b) provide services….

How would you rate sending potential clients an e-mail criticizing what they’re doing, and then offering your own services to fix it, as a marketing strategy — good, bad, or terrible? And why?

I’m not a spammer: I don’t send e-mails promoting my products unless people opt into my list.

Occasionally, though, people think I am spamming them: they either didn’t opt into the list and somehow got my e-mail by accident (how I have no idea) — or more likely opted into my list but forgot they did so or did not recognize my name in the from line.

What shocks me is that this (to me) mild inconvenience — a person getting an e-mail he doesn’t want and can delete with the click of a mouse — prompts unbelievably outraged and rude responses.

Example: “You #$&*&(#$! STOP SENDING ME THIS CRAPPY EMAILS FOR YOUR IDIOT STUFF YOU LOUSY SPAMMING SCUMBAG!!”

Is this an appropriate or acceptable reaction? No. Not even if you ARE being spammed.

A few months ago, a waiter in a restaurant tripped and literally spilled a bowl of drippy, stinky cole slaw all over my head.

Did I swear, rant, or rave?

No: I told the (visibly upset) young man, “No problem, accidents happen.”

But the person who told me to go #$&#*& myself because he received an e-mail he didn’t want apparently doesn’t think accidents happen — or that even if they do, the victim should be graceful and abide by the accepted rules of behavior in polite society.

What do you think? Was my e-mail correspondent way out of line? Or do you react the same way to things you don’t like when online?

JC, a reader of this blog, writes: “I’m putting together some direct marketing materials and I want to include a mini-CDROM. I’m targeting computer professionals, so I think they’ll be inclined to pop in the CD, even if they don’t read the rest of the material.

“I’m curious if other people have done this, and if so, what exactly they put on the CD. One thing is for sure: the CD needs to have a program launch up immediately, rather than make them browse the CD.”

I throw the question out to my blog readers. Do you have any experience using CD’s in direct marketing? Any advice or results you can share with JC.

I am writing an article about the state of copywriting and the freelance copywriting business today.

I have one question for you: would you advise a teenager today to pursue copywriting as a profession? Why or why not?